Mara (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
mara) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
shakydismount2012-12-28 11:53 pm
mara) wrote in shakydismount2012-12-28 11:53 pm
When the patriarchy hurts little boys
My 3 1/2 year old son needed new sneakers, so we went to the store. As soon as he saw the Dora shoes, it was love at first sight, so obviously I bought them for him. (By which I mean, I took a deep breath, got ready, and then bought them for him.)
It's only been a day and I've already had three family members (including one I wasn't expecting, damn it) to make a funny face at seeing him in shiny pink and purple sneakers. And he hasn't even had a day of school yet. ::facepalm::
I'm 99% sure the preschool teachers will nod and admire his new shoes, especially because he clearly adores them and sits in the back of the car repeating "I love my Dora shoes, Mommy!" However, his class this year has a high percentage of what the preschool teachers politely refer to as "rough and tumble boys".
(To give you an example: I asked one young man who looked lonely if he wanted to ask one of his classmates to play, because she also looked lonely. He looked at me like I had two heads and said "I don't play with girls. Only boys." When I immediately asked "Why?" he was completely stunned, like nobody had ever asked him that simple question before.)
I'm sure the four girls in his class will adore the shoes, but what the other 10 boys might say...oy. However, even if the preschool teachers blink at the shoes the first time, I can console myself with the fact that they will absolutely positively not tolerate any kind of mean thing being said to my little guy.
I'm sure y'all can appreciate how mad I am that I even need to THINK about this. Ugh.
It's only been a day and I've already had three family members (including one I wasn't expecting, damn it) to make a funny face at seeing him in shiny pink and purple sneakers. And he hasn't even had a day of school yet. ::facepalm::
I'm 99% sure the preschool teachers will nod and admire his new shoes, especially because he clearly adores them and sits in the back of the car repeating "I love my Dora shoes, Mommy!" However, his class this year has a high percentage of what the preschool teachers politely refer to as "rough and tumble boys".
(To give you an example: I asked one young man who looked lonely if he wanted to ask one of his classmates to play, because she also looked lonely. He looked at me like I had two heads and said "I don't play with girls. Only boys." When I immediately asked "Why?" he was completely stunned, like nobody had ever asked him that simple question before.)
I'm sure the four girls in his class will adore the shoes, but what the other 10 boys might say...oy. However, even if the preschool teachers blink at the shoes the first time, I can console myself with the fact that they will absolutely positively not tolerate any kind of mean thing being said to my little guy.
I'm sure y'all can appreciate how mad I am that I even need to THINK about this. Ugh.
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It is frustrating as hell to have to think about this stuff. Gah. The story about the little boy who doesn't play with girls -- oh, kid.
I don't have anything useful to offer, just commiseration.
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And yeah, "I don't play with girls". I just...what? I don't know what my face looked like precisely, but I would guess it was along the lines of o_O
::sigh::